Love is All You Need?

AUGUST 2011

In 1967 John Lennon wrote the song “All You Need is Love.” There are many people who would agree with that thesis. However, personal experience has  proven this axiom to be false. Using love as my main strategy did not come in handy in one particular event in my life. Love did not save my heart from breaking. It was this experience that disproved the theory that “All You Need is Love.” 

    In my junior year of high school, I had my first experience with heartache. In October of 2009, I began to date “Heather,” my first girlfriend ever. Despite busy schedules, our relationship survived for almost seven months. My confidence that I was with the right girl was very strong because in the movies, true love overcomes all obstacles. I naively expected this is how our relationship would turn out. However, I was in for a shock. 

    One day, I decided to be a super romantic boyfriend and put a note in her locker explaining how we both had been really busy and our schedules were about to clear up and we could go on a date again. A couple of days went by without her mentioning the note. This bothered me, but I refused to entertain any notion that our relationship was in any danger of ending. I thought there was no way that could happen to a relationship that was as magical as one in a Taylor Swift song. Eventually she asked if we could talk outside after school one day. As I walked outside I briefly considered that she might break up with me. I quickly quelled that idea because I unfortunately believed that today was a fairytale. We got outside and she promptly broke my heart.

    Of course, I could not accept that she truly felt that way. Obviously there was some logical flaw in her decision to end our enchanted romance, and if I could get her to see that, she would change her mind. A day after she broke up with me I felt I needed to speak now and make one of those dramatic relationship-saving speeches that you see in the movies. I was foolishly fearless because those speeches were extremely successful in all of the chick-flicks and romantic comedies I have been forced to watch in my life. This speech I had was filled with ridiculous pleas for us to get back together. I told her things like “You belong with me” and “You are the best thing that has ever been mine.” Naturally this absurd plan failed miserably. She explained that our love story was over.

    I thought our relationship would last forever and always like songs and movies made me believe. That following summer was absolutely miserable. The break up completely haunted me, but eventually I realized that “Heather” was just another picture to burn. Now I can look back and laugh at how ridiculous I was, thinking I could ride up on a white horse and save the day using a sword of love.

    I tried using love to solve this problem. It did not work and I struggled to see reality. Love caused pain. It was not all I needed. Love is an important tool to guide our decisions, but common sense and a sound mind are also essential to a proper and fulfilling life. Until the world embraces logic in romance, society will never grow up and continue to listen to cheesy love songs and watch romantic comedies.